Connect

Today I was reminded of the power of a name.

I think it's easy in the day to day to forget that all of the people I interact with at the store, or work, or out on the street are people. I'm not saying that I don't know that they are human beings but when there is no personal connection it's easy to dismiss their lives; or worse not even acknowledge what might be going on in their world. So many people get passed by without a thought. The person at the store who may have just found a first love. A person running the track near you who just had a lousy day at work. Someone who stayed up all night worrying about their husband/son/mother....

All these people with lives that I don't connect with. And it's unreasonable to connect with everyone... not to mention I wouldn't want to. But just as easy is to acknowledge them and say hello. I can't tell you how often I run by people who don't even look up from their world. Sometimes I wonder if they know that there are other people around. This has led me to think of my own response. Even when I am noticing the people around me that is not acknowledging them or the world I'm in. It takes and effort to get outside of my own head and touch lives. Perhaps it's that it feels vulnerable because I'm afraid that I won't get reciprocation of an acknowledgement. Whatever the reason I have started to remember the joy of connecting.

It started small really. While running, I'd make a conscious effort to nod at people as I passed them. It's funny because a nod is so impersonal, but it is still better than no response. I found that most people would nod back. And then my nod that I was doing started to be a smile. Smiles are contagious and most people would smile back. The past two times I've gone out running I've actually said, "Good Morning", "Hi!", or "Thanks for moving over." And it's amazing the energy I get back from this. Sure there are a few that still go on by in their own world, but more often than not I connect with the person for a moment. Sometimes a smile. Sometimes just an understanding glance. But the connection with these people, these strangers, is empowering.

I think it's funny that all of the service people you encounter throughout the day wear name tags that almost no one uses. Well, no one uses for good. Usually they are used in the context of, "What's your name? Tony? I'm reporting you to the manager!" But there are all of these people wearing their name on their chest, interacting with people, and so many people ignore it. So I've started noticing. I make a point of using someones name in my conversation with them. "Thanks for your help Tony!" Again it's a way to connect with the person and see them as someone who has their own life going on. It is a small gesture for me and almost a guaranteed smile from them. And doesn't helping someone smile feel great? I think I remember a study that showed that hearing your name causes a burst of positive energy, or endorphins in the brain. Not sure where I remember that from but it does sound right.

I connect with people and then I smile with the energy that the world gives back to me for the effort.